In scientific research about the death process, subjects repeatedly report that when they realize it is inevitable they are about to die, they completely give up. Then, a profound peace is felt, leading to a bright light or gateway they are compelled to step into.
This came to mind today, as I struggled with remaining mindfully detached about my physical state: pain, frustration and irritations--all around minutiae that would normally not even come up. It was just "one of those days"... I got myself embroiled in trying everything I could to change my emotional state, but was just feeling like I was drowning in a sea of overwhelming weakness and hopelessness. It seemed the more I tried to "do" something about it, the more extensive it became, until... I gave up.
I just let it all just be what it was, giving up trying to do anything to change the state. Suddenly, I was engulfed in a profound calm, and right away everything seemed to be in its right place, and there was nothing to do--all was moving according to Plan.
As I continued to sit with this energy, I realized I'd been tripped up by my monkey mind once again. Sneaky little sucker. As my state worsened, and as I kept doing things to try to change it, the mind went into a state of alarm, becoming frantic, desperate and depressed. The powerlessness became an existential threat, and so the monkey mind started revving up for fight or flight.
This clearly reveals the Lie of Control. For a long time, I was confused about the basic difference between "control" and "creation". Isn't "creation" controlling? Under the spell of this confusion lies the gaping temptation--after making a choice--to attempt to control all the elements that you think need to be controlled in order to manifest or actualize that desire. This is the ego-mind trap that can too easily lead down a most uncomfortable rabbit hole of pain and suffering--not to mention a ton of work
You intend to have or be something, and at a quantum level, it's happening--instantly. We get tripped up by the passage of time, and our unawareness or unacceptance of this concept, which makes us believe we need to control everything for the desired outcome. By attempting to control the quantum state, it is pretty much guaranteeing you'll be injecting force fields between your original intention and its inevitable outcome.
We were taught in so many ways the master-slave paradigms of: "You must Work hard for what you want". The trouble is, the more you grasp for what it is you desire, the more the universe responds to you're not having it. As demonstrated in quantum physics experiments, the state of particle-waves changes upon measurement--meaning that what you watch changes. If you intend or choose for something to happen, and then watch every single, little process leading to the actualization of that thing, you'll be watching for a long time--and working your ass off.
What's really needed is that once a choice is intended, give up on trying to control the getting of it. It's already in process and is inevitably on its way to you. It is the disbelief in this feature of consciousness, that blocks or creates barriers to the intention. We're watching the particle-waves coalescing around our choice too much, thus changing the outcome, or inserting more time and events than originally required. We get our attention stuck on the not having, which gets reflected back to us, as time trudges on.
Each of us is a Creator with a capital "C". That's literally ALL we do--consciously and unconsciously. We cannot do or be anything else. Unless, of course, you want to as an ego exercise, give up "making it happen" in the certainty it is already on the way, and then just enjoy the ride, open to responding joyfully to events unfolding in the having of it.
To your quantum health,